As I was laying in bed last night... I realized that perhaps it isn't about forgiveness. Perhaps it is simply about acceptance.
Acceptance of my mom for who she is... the good, bad and ugly. So she wasn't the mom I needed her to be... so save me from the big bad wolf... but she did the best she could, I suppose. I mean, most parents will do their best.
So, suddenly it isn't about being let down and needing to forgive... That brings up a bigger issue... if you read the comments on forgiveness. But rather, acceptance. I have to simply (or not so simply) accept my mom for all she is or isn't.
I feel lighter... a little bit more free. Only she has to live with her life. I have to live with some of the consequences of that life chosen but then I get to move from that point to claim or live out my own destiny.
Does this make sense?
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