Sad...

Today is the last day of school.  It is a year that comes with too many goodbyes.  Of course, every year brings changes and families go and come.  This year... I am overwhelmed at the sadness I feel.  I am not sure how to explain it, either.  After hearing that one of my friends has decided not to come back, I found myself sobbing as if my heart was broken.  I was surprised at my emotions, as I am not a crying kind of girl anymore.   Sanj just held me.

Of course I know that this doesn't change the friendship but changes the effort a bit.  I see a little girl who keeps writing on her Facebook page how much she is going to miss Rhema and I find myself praying for a miracle.  This family needs us as much as we need them.  Each year at the end of summer we see miracles happening.  Families that could not afford to return are gifted by a generous heart.  This is met with tears of joy, seeing God's hand so at work.

Then there is the staff... The Mama Bear of Rhema is retiring.  Sigh.  I know it is inevitable yet it is such a loss.  How are we going to be without her?  Of course I know it will be different... each new one brings their own uniqueness yet... I don't like it.  I need to see my friend there when I walk in.  We will her so much.  I will miss her so much.  I received so much wisdom from her over the years.  Now what?

Today was the Friday morning singing which my dear husband takes time off every week to come do.  It is church.  Hearing  those little ones sing, not questioning God at all is so priceless. I saw my husband moved to tears as he was playing.  He was looking out over the bunch of kids and I could see him take in all the little ones that will no longer be with us.  I could see that he was wondering if these songs will be ones that will carry them onward.  We have to believe that they will.  They will know that Jesus loves them.  They will not forget it.  

Oh  ... in a perfect world... money would never keep those that don't have it from being with us. In a perfect world...  


Dear God,
Our school family is changing... in so many sad ways.  Some of these kids are so sad that they can' t be there again.  Please Lord, You do know who, why and how.  I trust... as it is all I can do.  I look forward to miracles again, this fall.
Amen.