Best Way To Wake Up...

I love rainy days especially when I can stay home. It is a great day to do laundry and not sink into depression. I love storms. I wish they would last longer. I especially love a great thunder storm. It is the best way to wake up. Or sleep in. It stays dark and I love to just pull up my blankets and lay there. I wish could sleep but since kids, my body refuses to acknowledge the concept of sleeping in after 7:30 a.m.

So this is the sounds I wake up to this morning. It was great. I wish the thunder and lightening would last for hours. It doesn't. Then I hear thunder again. Oh wait... it's my kids fighting or something. Really is that necessary?

Another favorite sound of mine is my children asleep. I am sure I have blogged that already. But it is a favorite so I figured it bares repeating. Sounds... funny how some are so soothing and others have the effect of nails on a chalkboard.

Balancing Act

Remember asking your parents... "Who do you love more?" and the reply was always along the lines of' "I love you all equally."
OK that is a load of doodoo. I don't think that is the honest answer. Or maybe I am just different (which of course is not a secret)! I have thought of that question and the real answer.

With 6 children, each so different, I have to try really hard to make sure to "love them" conscientiously. What I mean by that is, take Max, for example, he is a quiet child, soften spoken and kind of a loner. He likes a quiet space and playing with his toys.
I have to stop and think, did I physically hug him, tickle him or tease him? This is his love language.

Then there is Sammy, who is very huggy and verbal child. He will still come and sit on our laps and snuggle, say I love you and it is a impulse to simply love him back. He is never short of love. But he needs to be reassured after he has done something impulsive and driven us crazy.

So I am always checking myself. Did I love all my children enough today? I know that they are the best thing that has happened to me but there are many times they drive me bonkers and I don't hesitate to let them know.

But do I love them equally? I would have to say that isn't really even a fair question. No I don't. I can't. They are too different to love equally. It is not even a realisitic question. But I love each of them differently with all my heart. I am sure if there was a scale to measure the love for each of them in their different ways, it would be equal. But I am not sure.

I know I don't like them all equally. Some of them I just don't get. Then others are so me that I don't like that either.
I think it is ok to not like your children 100% of the time. But to accept them as they are is my lifelong goal. They are not me and will not have my experiences to shape them. They will have their own and I have to realize and accept that I will not understand or know of all of them. That is a hard one.

Yes, I do have favorites, but that changes daily, sometimes hourly.

Phew, that is stressing me out. I can't imagine each of them having pains and hurts that I can't kiss or put a bandaid on. But I know that I need to make sure they know that I will love them even if I don't like them at that moment.

It is a balancing act. It is one I hope I am not messing up. I love them so much. I love them each 100% yet very differently.

In Your Time

I have had a day full of emotions that have been up and down. I am exhausted, emotionally. Sanj was playing me some songs that he redid from his 25th alumni reunion, Eternal Praise. As I listened, a song that really moved me was "In His Time." It was one that I clung to going through some rough times in my 20s. My faith was so SIMPLE. I miss that. I hate the constant doubt of "Are You There, God, It's Me, Reema..."

I am going to try and put the music on here... but here are the words:

In His time, in His time
He makes all things beautiful in His time
Lord, please show me every day as You're teaching me Your way
that You do just what You say in Your time

In Your time, in Your time
You make all things beautiful in Your time
Lord, my life to You I bring may each song I have to sing
be to You a lovely thing in Your time


As I was talking to Sanj, he said... it's an easier thing to sing than live. Now almost 40, I want that again.
Faith. I want to be a woman of faith. Lord, Help me Believe again and KNOW in my core that You are IN COMPLETE control.
I know I just need that mustard seed. You will make it grow. If I look back, I see all the things You DID make beautiful and it was in YOUR time.

I want that Peace that passeth all understanding. I need it. I didn't understand those words as a kid... now I sing that song craving that peace beyond all understanding. All my friends out there, I pray this for you tonight too.

23 More Sleeps!

I am sick of making lunches.
I am sick of having to repeat (loudly) "GO TO BED!" Especially when it is still not dark!
i am sick of lunches not being eaten fully.
I am sick of 7 o'clock wake ups.
OK really 7:30 am wake ups... and then scrambling.
I am sick of "I have no clean pants." What is wrong with the dirty ones from yesterday?
I am sick of "LET'S GO... We're LATE!"
I am sick of HOMEWORK.
I am sick of "I need this much $ for this field trip." Are you going to come on the trip?

I am ready for SLEEPING IN!
I am ready for "Oh it's 1 pm we should eat lunch, eh?"
I am ready for "Want to go to the beach?"
I am ready for shorts full time. (tonight there is suppose to be frost... how crazy is that)?
I am ready for a tan! haha

23 more sleeps till Summer Break begins. I know the first 2 weeks are hard ... to get adjusted to slowing down... and then it is good. Till I hear.... " I am bored." "There is nothing to do."

Can' t wait!

2 + 1 = 3

My brother, Kumar and his wife, Reg welcomed their 3rd child... Wilomina Grace Dixit was born this morning at 9:19am. She was 6.05 lbs and 19 3/4 inches.

Proud sister, Jaelin and Brother Eli were excited to be informed they get to boss her around!

Congratulations on having your hands full!

Go Green!

I am lazy. I hate all the guilt about our earth fading into nothing for our children. I hate the guilt of composting, recycling, reusing. I hate feeling guilty over using paper plates when I am too lazy or tired to do dishes. I really dislike the "green people" that make it look so easy.

But the guilt has finally got to me. How can I now take care of this place? So I am taking baby steps to becoming the environment's friend. I am sure most of you know this stuff...especially if you watch Oprah. So here are the baby steps...and some information on why I have chosen these little steps. Maybe you may choose to GO GREEN too!

Grocery Bags... Do you know how much groceries we buy? OK even just for half the week? LOTS! I have decided that I am going to buy the REUSABLE BAGS.... even though I will have to buy 20. At least I know they are not going to tear on me... A BIG PET PEEVE!

Did you know:
It's a question you're asked all the time, "Paper or plastic?" What's the environmentally correct answer? Simran says it's really, "Neither." More than 380 million plastic bags are thrown away in the United States every year, and those plastic bags can take up to 1,000 years to biodegrade in landfills. And while paper bags do eventually biodegrade, an estimated 14 million trees a year have to be cut down to make 10 billion paper bags.

I am going to stop buying the convenient water bottles and get my lazy butt up to fill our water non-plastic water bottles.
My kids never remember to bring their bottles home, though, so it is a little annoying.

Did you know:
When you buy one liter of water at the store, you're actually consuming about six liters of water. That's because when manufacturers make plastic bottles, it takes five liters of water to cool the plastic. To save the resources used in creating all those bottles, it is suggested to get a water filter and a reusable aluminum or plastic bottle from a company like Sigg, Nalgene or New Wave Enviro.

One thing to consider if you buy a plastic bottle is its grade. Look on the bottom of the bottle for a small plastic triangle with a number in the middle. If you see a number 2, 4 or 5, the bottle is safe. If it has some other number, don't use it as a water bottle. Those other plastics can make your water taste like plastic and leach harmful chemicals into your body. You don't want your water tasting like plastic. If you're tasting plastic, you're ingesting plastic.

OK and I am going to make a better effort to recycle faithfully. We do this the best out of all the green stuff.

This one I have already done for most of our bulbs.
Did you know:

Replacing regular, inefficient lightbulbs with compact florescent lighbulbs (CFLs) can make a big difference.
A CFL is 70 to 75 percent more efficient than other bulbs. Florescent bulbs will cost a little more up front, you should save money on your electricity bill over time. Plus, these bulbs can last 8 to 10 years!If every family replaced one bulb with a CFL, it would be like reducing carbon emissions from 800,000 cars. Have a lightbulb moment and change out one lightbulb!"

Go green with me.

All Done!

I am surround by family who are all expecting babies. Most are on # 3, that was just half way for me. I would get major baby pangs just being around newborns. I loved being pregnant. I loved all the movement and rolling in my belly. I loved the anticipation of what this little being would be like. I was always lucky Sanj and I were on the same page.

Now I am actually allergic to newborns. They make me fell like I am going to get a rash. I feel like I can't breathe. When I hold one... my arms feel weak. And then there is the cry.... when I hear the cry I just want to go and hug the mom.

Guess I am done. Now the fear of a oops is so not funny. People love telling me stories along the lines of ..."I have a friend who had 6 boy and then the 7th was a girl!" Or "I know someone that had 5 boys... and then oop happened and she had twin boys in her 40s." SO NOT FUNNY! I don't really like these stories and or even see the need for them!

There is a season for every thing. I loved pregnancy, labour not so much, babies were heaven. That was a season. The leaves are changing colors.

I am ready! Bring on the teen years. Ok I am really not ready for it yet but what choice do we have?

Moodiness, craziness... I love you, I hate you, I am sorry, I forgive you... Bring it on.

All of you that are pregnant, changing diapers and waking up at night... enjoy the season. It is so special.
And congratulations ... better you than me. :)

New Love

Can I tell you I love blogging? I had been journaling for years, since my early university days. Those are funny to read. As I grew older and time got shorter I found that I would journal only when bad stuff or stressful stuff was happening. Those are not as fun to read... although i do see so many instances where God carried me through it all.

Blogging... it is fulfilling the need to write. Maybe this is my apprenticeship to my book/s. You are my critics... so bring it on.
Thanks for reading and commenting. I have so much to say... so much that goes through my mind in a 24 hour period that it feels great to put it on "paper." It really do suck at grammar and spelling. Sanj is always criticizing my writing... he is my faithful editor. It has made to want to learn the right ways to spell words I would have just faked. I am learning! And I am not in school!

I love the fact that I can write about anything... it doesn't matter if anyone is really reading it but if does feel good to get that occasional feedback. So thanks for going on this ride with me.

If you decide to start a blog... I would love to know.

So I will end this blog with a short conversation with Zach (the 6 year old)...
"Mom, when I am in high school and learn to drive... can I have a corvette?"
Me... "Um If you can pay for it." So likely NO."

Golf is like handbag shopping...

Golf replaces hockey in our home in the warmer weather. It is actually an obsession. Tyler can only think of "when can I get to the course?" It is an effective grounding tool! Too bad I can't ground Sanj. He just gets plain ole' grumpy when he can not golf. I have learned it is better to shoo them out the door and then breathe.

Max has joined the gang. He can only golf with Sanj still but cannot get enough. Sammy is my most level headed of the group. He loves it, is really good at it yet knows his limit... and mine.

So I am in Sanj's vehicle and notice a paper with numbers... its various golf clubs. He responds, "I was just trying a few out."

Hum... I get it.

I love purses. It was the only thing that never changed sizes on me during the many years of pregnancy.

You don't need new clubs (or a purse) but it sure is nice to have new accessories. It is fun to have the latest "model."

Good thing I don't like golf... I just saw a cute set of pink clubs, oh and then there was the shoes that looked great... well, then I would definitely need a new outfit!

Wish List

I just finished book called "20 Wishes." It was a beach read that I breezed through. I was thinking of what are things I really want to do. Some are for now with my kids, others are later with Sanj and a few are ones just for me. Reminded me of the "Bucket List" but rather than waiting till that much later in life I thought of making a list now.

1. Fly a kite with the boys. (We did this with the older boys... but haven't done so with the younger brood).
2. Have more picnics... real ones... and just be.
3. Look for the positives in my children and let them delight me. (delight... I like that word).
4. Teach my kids to cook... the ones that really like it and I am always in too much of a hurry.
5. Go on a RV trip with the boys. Explore.
Things for Sanj and I:
6. Travel Europe (maybe with a backpack but more likely in 5 stars hotels).
7. Go on an African Safari.
8. Live on water in a warm place.
9. Beat Sanj in a round of golf.
10. Adopt a child.
Things for me:
11. Have a little 2 seater car. Lime green or red!
12. Write a book.
13. Have a book be a best seller that changes people.
14. Become a public speaker... help women empower themselves to be the best they can be.
15. Take a photography class.
Things just because:
16. Adopt a child... or a house full.
17. Be a missionary to a faraway land.
18. Learn to be really good at one sport.
19. Have a horse... learn to ride.
20. Own a store... it would be a store all for boys. Have great clothing and toys just for boys.

Faith Wrestling

Over the last years I have been struggling with God. It's like we are having an arm wrestling match. I want Him to take my arm and slam it down, HARD and just let me feel that faith I had not too long ago. I would have never let a few life disappointing moments ever kicked my butt. But I must admit the last years, with some huge life changing disappointments, when I really thought God and I were on the same page...I fell hard. My faith was crushed. And though in my heart I really wanted to just brush it off and hang on to that virgin faith... it really hurt.

I know in my heart that God felt my pain. For whatever reason, I know it hurt Him to say no... or not right now... and I know He was looking out for me... but my disappointment and pain was all consuming and crushing. Church hurt. I would go, sit and hear these songs that spoke right to me... and it just hurt. I felt I was being mocked. I realize that God doesn't do this. I know He is a God of LOVE. I KNOW THIS.

But I just didn't feel it. I remember being at a women's retreat... laying out by the water... weeping.... begging God to just wrap His arms around me because at that very moment, I NEED TO FEEL HIM! OK I would like to say, " then I felt a touch on my shoulder and knew it was a hug from God." NOPE... rather I saw a rodent and freaked right out! :)

I wish it wasn't so hard. Or maybe it is just hard for me. Maybe all those people that feel God's touch or hear God's voice make it hard on people like me.

I realize now that what I got instead WAS hugs... through an amazing group of friends. I just didn't see it at the time. I found out that as I became part of a bigger thing the pain, hurting and disappointment lessened. Sometimes it is a dull ache. God doesn't give you something you cannot handle. God must have a LOT of faith in me.

I am handling it. I am growing from it. I am learning to take baby steps toward climbing back up that tower of faith again.
Except i am not so naive anymore. I know that my relationship with God isn't going to be a bowl of cherries. That was when i was 12. Perhaps He knows I am ready for a grown up relationship with Him. I just needed to see that.

He doesn't promise it all. He just promises to be there. I love the "Footsteps" poem... I know that He has carried me over the years so many times. There would be no other way I would have made it. I just didn't have it in me.

He wrapped His arms around me that is why I could cry. He had given me His Shoulder to cry on.

It's like any relationship with its ups and downs. I am ready for this journey, God. Help me to have total faith. Help me to be that person I know You are shaping me to be. Help me to understand our relationship is that... a relationship. It is going to have its ups and downs and that is OK. I know that you can handle me when I am angry or disappointed. It is OK to be mad, right? It is OK to doubt sometimes, right? But I know that I would rather live in faith that YOU ARE GOD and there is a future and hope. There is a real home for me that is perfect. There is more than this crazy family.. there is HOPE of real true PEACE and PERFECTION.

I NEED to believe. I already tried with out it and it is too hard. It was harder than I thought. So I am ready.
I promise to love you, honor you, be faithful to you in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better , for worse,in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon You my heart's deepest devotion.

Lessons in Life

In April, Maya Angelou was interviewed by Oprah on her 70+ birthday.
Oprah asked her what she thought of growing older.

And, there on television, she said it was "exciting." Regarding body changes, she said there were many, occurring every day...like her breasts. They seem to be in a race to see which will reach her waist, first.

The audience laughed so hard they cried. She is such a simple and honest woman, with so much wisdom in her words!

Maya Angelou said this:
I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow."

"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."

"I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life."

"I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as "making a life."

"I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance."

"I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able throw some things back."

"I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision."

"I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one."

"I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back."

"I've learned that I still have a lot to learn."

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

I have read this before, but today as I read it I thought of it as something I want to teach my children.
I love the last one. I think of that in terms of my kids. They will probably forget all the times I lost it (or it will be a blur), they will forget all the THINGS I DO but I am sure that if they are made to FEEL so LOVED and CHERISHED they won't forget that! You can't forget that. Think of the people that have made an impact on you, or your life...it is likely how they made you feel.

Of all my children, Josh is THE MOMMA'S BOY. He just loves me. Now I realize that he is 3 and by the time he is 13 he will know doubt hate me. But he makes me feel so loved. Despite the annoyance of being smothered, I have to admit that I love it.
I love how it makes me feel... so needed, wanted and cherished... I know that no one can fill that need but me. (Sorry Sanj)!

God Sightings

This is a picture taken by NASA with the Hubble telescope. They are referring to it as the "Eye of God". I thought it was a neat God sighting.

In my spiritual walk I am not one of those people who have had God "speak" through them. I have had feeling, thoughts maybe even nudges but the few times I thought God was telling me something... I ended up being very mislead. So I have really tried hard to just let things reveal themselves. I know people that have said they literally felt a hand on their shoulder and knew it was God.

I complained about this to my Doctor during one of my sessions and she simply said, "You are not sitting still to let Him." Well as annoying as that answer was there is obviously some truth in there. But I did reply, "Well God did give me the gift of ADHD! He knows I can't sit still!" I am sure God doesn't have favorites. (Though I must admit, it seem that way may times).

Anyway, as I am working on my relationship with God, I have decided to look for Him in the every day. Our pastor preached a sermon once on "God Sightings." I liked that. When I stopped and looked or listened, I could see His Hand.

So I on a quest for God Sighting in my own life. It has been bothering me that I did not bother to blog this experience... so here it is... and I definitely know this was God's intervention. As you know, I went to Maryland with Josh for my brother's graduation. I got to the airport... ready to get this show on the road. As I get into line, the lady asked for Josh's passport. Well we usually always drive and his birth certificate was enough. My travel agent didn't say anything either. The lady said that she was sure that they wouldn't let me through... but she would talk to her supervisor. All I could think about was the money that I had just spent!

Well a long story short, I had to go to the immigration room (where they enjoy causing stress), be granted a one time pass, missed my flight by 10 minutes, waited till 5 pm and missed all but the last 5 minutes of my brother's party.

I did pray throughout this whole stressful process. I know this was a God thing because each person made sure I knew THIS never happened.

Thank you God for coming through for me! It was great to celebrate my brother's accomplishment.

God sighting... my definition is simply things that occur with divine intervention ... there is simply no other way. Well unless you believe in luck, a rabbit's foot or karma. I have decided that it is comforting to believe in a higher power. A father that is looking out for my best interest, loving me and guiding me.

I would love to hear your God sighting if you want to share. I will share mine as I see them... this may take a while, as I am near sighted!

Yummy!

This is a recipe I make maybe twice a year. It is baked french toast that you make the night before. It is delicious! When you read the recipe, you will see why I make it only twice a year.




INGREDIENTS
1/2 (1 pound) loaf French bread, cut diagonally in 1 inch slices
4 eggs
1 cup milk
3/4 cup half-and-half cream
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 cup and 2 tablespoons butter
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 tablespoon and 1-1/2 teaspoons light corn syrup


DIRECTIONS
Butter a 9x13 inch baking dish. Arrange the slices of bread in the bottom. In a large bowl, beat together eggs, milk, cream, vanilla and cinnamon. Pour over bread slices, cover, and refrigerate overnight.
The next morning, preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). In a small saucepan, combine butter, brown sugar and corn syrup; heat until bubbling. Pour over bread and egg mixture.
Bake in preheated oven, uncovered, for 40 minutes.

This is for 6 people or so. Enjoy!!!

Learning to BREATHE

I am no doubt ADHD... usually if life isn't full speed ahead then it is not what I know. Obviously, life is simply busy with normal stuff that is part of being a family. As I am reassessing life, making changes and tackling challenges, I have realized that I do not take time to really breathe.

Of course everyone living person breathe's naturally through the nostrils, without attempting to control our breath. What I have realized lately is when I am feeling panicked, I need to stop and just breathe. I had this moment this weekend. It was half an hour to our open house and I was in the shower feeling VERY overwhelmed. I have never had a panic attack but image it was close to what I felt at the moment.

Suddenly I realized I just needed to breathe. DEEP BREATHES and FOCUS on only that for a moment. Maybe I am breathing dyslexic!

When I was pregnant with Sammy, Sanj and I went to the prenatal classes and one of the things they teach you is breathing. That whole HEE HEE HA or is it HA HA HE? Anyway, being the ever faithful student Sanj, during labour Sanj told me, "You are breathing wrong!" I assure you this did not go over well with me!

Maybe this is something that all of you do or know. But I have found another coping method (especially when Zantax isn't available)! I know it is a form of meditation but I am not at that place to sit or focus for 10-15 minutes. Perhaps I will grow to that at some point. My father in law does yoga every morning. Discipline is what I am working towards.

Normal is Relative

I was at the doctor's today and heard the usual, "You have 6 boys?!!!" We are more like a smaller family when you look at the Duggar Family...

They have 17 children and are expecting their 18th! 10 boys and 7 girls... Joshua, Jana & John-David (twins), Jill, Jessa, Jinger, Joseph, Josiah, Joy-Anna, Jedidiah & Jeremiah (twins), Jason, James, Justin, Jackson, Johannah, Jennifer (and #18 due in January 2009!).

They are all homeschooled too! They were featured on TLC's show " 16 and moving."

OK, Normal IS Relative!

Two Faced!

Sammy came back from a trip overnight school trip. As I sat in the car, I watched him goofing around with his friends, laughing, portraying an image of happiness. The car door opens and BOOM... he turns into the miserable child who is wrought with over tiredness.

A while ago, after watching this similar behavior over and over again I called him on it. There is a story of the "2 Carolines" in the Bedtime Stories. It is about a child acting one way with her teacher and then coming home and treating her mother horrible. One day after she is rude to her mother, her mom tells her there is a visitor in the living room. Of course Caroline is shocked to see her teacher sitting there and had listened to her horrid behavior and was there for dinner.

I never forgot that story. I called Sammy (and the other boys in general) on their behavior. How could they be one way with their friends and then another with family in the car? "You are being 2 faced!" I will never forget Sammy's answer..."You do it too with your friends!" (SLAP ME ACROSS THE FACE)!

How many times have I yelled and then one of my friends comes to the window, I put a smile on and talk all nice?

Way is it so easy to be the hardest on the ones you love the most?

I have been trying really hard to be REAL with my children and my friends all the time. Would I act like this if my friend was in the room? I sure hope so or at least have made a bigger effort.

Rules to Live By

While in Maryland, we took my brother's children and Josh to a petting farm.
This sign was posted once you entered the animals:
























I thought this would be a great code to live by for the boys at home! :)

Better Speech and Hearing Month

May is Better Speech and Hearing month! All my kids had speech issues... of course this was linked to their ear issues. Thank Goodness I know a great AUDIOLOGIST! :)

Ear infections, tubes, ENT visits all have been part of my life with pretty much each of my boys. I can not stress the importance of getting their hearing and eyes checked regularly. It does not hurt and can make such a huge difference.

FUN FACTS

Cicadas have their hearing organs in their stomachs.
Crickets have their hearing organs in their knees.
Male mosquitoes hear with thousands of tiny hairs growing on their antennae.
Fish do not have ears but they can hear. They hear pressure changes through ridges on their bodies.
Snakes do not have ears, but their tongues are sensitive to sound vibrations.
In World War One (WWI) parrots were kept on the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France because of their remarkable sense of hearing. When the Parrots heard the enemy aircraft coming they would warn everyone of the approaching danger long before any human ear would hear it.


CHILDHOOD HEARING LOSS

The vast majority of hospitals now offer newborn hearing screening before discharge from the hospital.
All children should be screened for hearing loss before 1 month of age.
85% of all children experience at least one ear infection.
Second-hand smoke in the home increases the risk of middle ear infections and respiratory allergies in children.
Infants may begin to use hearing aids as early as 2-4 months of age.
Federal laws mandate that all school districts must provide specialized education to children with hearing loss.
Even a mild hearing loss can seriously impact a child’s ability to learn in a school environment.

PREVALENCE OF HEARING LOSS & DEMOGRAPHICS

1 out of 10 Americans have a hearing loss --- that’s more than 31,000,000 people.
3 out of 1000 children are born with hearing loss.
1.4 million children have hearing loss.
15% of “baby-boomers” (ages 45-64) have hearing loss.
29% of people over age 65 have hearing loss.
The majority (65%) of people with hearing loss are below retirement age.
The majority (60%) of people with hearing loss are males.


Hey.. Get your hearing checked out! If you are local... get a free hearing test @ The Ear Company (705) 741-1114 by mentioning this blog. (This clinic is in Peterborough or Port Hope Ontario)!

Polar Opposites

Sanj and I were good friends for MANY years before we started dating. So when friendship changed to romance there was not any room for pretense from either of us. We could only be real with each other. He is 3 and a half years older and I simply wanted to impress him when we were in university together. He was (is) so smart and studious. I can remember the only class we took together Philosophy ... he was taking notes and I would be doodling in my notebook.

We are opposites. Do they really attract? He is a morning person... I am so NOT! My roommate in university called me the Evil Demon in the morning. He is musical ... I sing 6th alto...apparently. He is athletic, I am not. He is, for lack of a better word... uptight... stresses... I tend to be more relaxed. He is a worrywart and I tend to assume it will work out.
He crossed at the crosswalk... I jaywalk. He keeps all the laws where as I tend to bend them, if possible.

He loves school and is a great student... I am not. I love to shop... he does not. I love to go out on the weekends... he would rather stay at home and relax.

OK you get my point. We are so opposite each other. What makes it work? I guess the fact the we ARE opposites. If we were both lackadaisical that would be a total fiasco. If we were both worriers there would likely be heart attacks happening. But as it is, if Sanj has a coronary , i would be there to restart his heart! :)

So many couples I know compliment each other traits. Do opposites really attract? Not sure but I am glad that these particular opposites do!

Thank you God, for putting a man in my life that loves me unconditionally, even when I ruin his prized rink, that makes me a better person and allows me to grow within myself.
Thanks that he lets me sleep in, does not ask me to play golf and yet appreciates me in a cute golf outfit!

He loves me all the time... where as my love is dependent on his behavior! :P

Success!

If you told me we were going to make $1800 from other people's stuff... I may not have been as creeped out! :) GREAT, EH?
It was busy till the end and actually fun! It was a great social time for those that came to help. People that came first thing in the morning stayed till the end.

The kids had a great time looking through the "stuff" and felt victory at a 25 cent thingy. I love the fact that it was about a group of people working together for a common goal of raising money for our kids playground.

The last hour folks could buy whatever they could carry out for $5... you should have seen the delight. This also got rid of a lot of the items. Next year will be even better!

Thanks to all of you that supported in donating, helping and buying the "STUFF"... what a great day it was.

Garage Sale

Rhema Christian School is having a HUGE indoor garage sale this weekend. We are FUNdraising for playground equipment!
We spent most of the day sorting thru other people's STUFF. Maybe because of how we grew up... accepting hand me downs and going to garage sales, I have a very strong AVERSION to other people's stuff.

Nothing against you folk that go out at 6:30 am and are the "early birds" that yard sale people dislike... please don't take offense. You keep a whole group of folks delighted. I am just saying it isn't for me. Touching the stuff, first of all, creeps me out. I feel the need to bathe in scalding water after the fact.

I think what had me distrubed the most the is the CRAP people bring in. If you are having your OWN garage sale.. it is your business. We are a charity... trying to RAISE money... so the fact that people sent stuff homeless people would be offend to receive ... that we have to PAY to dump was highly upsetting to me.

Top 3 weird stuff that was donated:
1. handmade dolly thingys
2. a dishwasher rack...
3. a USED TOLIET BRUSH!!!

OK Is that weird or what??? Why not bring your crap in a bag and sell for 25 cents?
The other funny thing was that in the pile of stuff... this family brings in this housewarming present WE had given them!
Guess we know what they thought of it!

God, I pray that you bless our efforts and bring in a huge number of garage sale folks this weekend to the school.
May they find treasures in the midst of all the STUFF. May I find a Zantax pill to help me thru the day. Amen.

If you would like to donate FUNds feel free to contact me!
Happy Victoria Day Weekend!

Back to real life...

Going to my brother's graduation was a nice getaway. I enjoyed the one on one with Josh, who was quite a trooper and just a break from every day. Now I am back to every day life. Sanj and the boys enjoyed a weekend of hanging out doing the daddy thing... which included many desserts, I was told!

Each of the boys express their love so differently or that they missed me. Sammy is just plain expressive... He just says it. We are so alike. Tyler doesn't say much. He will hug and say "love you" and not much more. Tickling him relaxes him and makes him more expressive but not by much. Jordan doesn't say much but will call me literally 5-6xs a day just to say something totally not relevent. But he doesn't say what he is really feeling... I miss you mom. Max is just quiet. The day before I left he was upset and cried over something very minor ... so unlike him. The morning I was leaving I had to find him, hanging out on his bunk. He was so quiet and I had to ask him if he was going to miss me... and he mumbles yes. Zachary was clingy. When I returned he didn't leave my side.

PHEW. They are so different. Yet they love their mom! I need to go away a bit more just to be reminded! :)

Dr. Rajkumar Dixit

My baby brother whose diapers I changed graduated with his Doctorate in Ministry! Wow... he has come a long way. I am so proud of him. He has grown into a man that I am proud of and pray that God uses him to continue to change lives.

Happy Mother's Day

ONE MORE SLEEP! Tomorrow at this time I will be in hanging out with no kiddies hanging on! Ok I am counting on the fact that my kids do not really read my blog so I can honestly say... I can't wait!
But again, I can honestly say I miss them already. It is the curse of motherhood... I think. I love them so much but KNOW that by Tuesday night I will be ready to be back in the crazy of it all.

Since I am missing Mother's Day, tonight we went to dinner and I got flowers, great cards and Grey's Anatomy DVD series. Sammy heard on the radio today that what most moms wanted most was a night to watch McDreamy and eat popcorn in peace. Cute, eh? I love Grey's Anatomy and popcorn is my most favorite snacky food.

(What I heard was that moms wanted an afternoon nap... uninterrupted)!

I got all the homemade gifts and they each had their way of making it really theirs. So as I ponder Mother's Day and being a mom I thank you God, for the gift of my sons. Even in those moments when I think of life all alone with only me to think of ... I can't help but realize this is me 100%. I was made to be mom. It is my biggest blessing and yes, it comes with the moments of cursing too.

It is weird to think that I have been a mom for 12.5 years! I remember being 12 myself and that doesn't seem too long ago. I want so badly to bless my children with a balance of a "cool mom" and yet still be the mom that they know will beat their little butts if needed! (no not literally... CSA not needed)!

I think of all the moms in my life... thank you for sharing, caring and and being an encouragement to me in your own way.
Happy Mother's Day to each of you... may you have days filled with knowing you are one of the biggest blessings in your child's life and that thanks comes in all those small, sticky, yummy, wonderful little ways.

Happy Mother's Day!

3 more sleeps!

My brother Kumar is graduating with his doctorate this weekend. I am so proud of him! Its Mother's Day weekend too. So I was torn knowing that its a special day for my kids to show their love for me... and yet really wanting to be there to celebrate with my brother.

So 3 more sleeps! Mother's Day comes early (Friday) and Josh and I are off to Maryland. I am so looking forward to it! I love spending time with my brother and family. I am looking forward to catching up with Sanj's cousins and add some shopping to the mix... some great restaurants, no housework or laundry, maybe sleeping in and Josh occupied with Ammama makes for a perfect getaway!

I am surrounded by such motivated, smart people! It is a good thing that I am not too insecure in that area. Sanj is working on his doctorate too. His grades on a test are 128%. Is there a need for that? I hated school and am so glad to be done with it! I love learning... hands on. I hate classrooms and all that pressure of grades.

Funny I chose the profession of teaching eh? :) Well I thought I could make it better. What I didn't count on was once I had my own kids I wouldn't have the patience and love for other people's kids.

So now I am in search of a new career. Real Estate is right now my #1 choice. I love houses. I love the search for the perfect house. Since I spend a lot of computer time on MLS maybe I should get paid for it!

One of my life goals is to write a book. The pressure is on as this is one of my brother's goals too and I think he has started.
I have so much to say! But does any one really want to hear it? Another one... I am not sure it is really a goal but I would love to be a motivational speaker but since I get sick to my stomach and shake like a leaf when up front that may be on the back burner a while. I would love to do something with photography too. The lotto... would love to win just a couple of million.

Adopt a house full of orphans would be a life dream fulfilled.

Are you one of those "Nice People?"

Maybe I shouldn't have written my last blog about nice people. I guess it could get you questioning if that is what you are in my life! If you have this blog address... chances are you are not one of them! But as Sanj and I question some of the people in our lives it also makes me think of how to be a real friend.

It has to be somewhat give and take rather than one sided. I hate when someone says, "we should go see a movie..." and I say "Let me know when!" If I am willing to make the effort and be your friend, I expect the same in return. I find it offensive that people do not follow thru... or rather revealing.

There are so many friends from my AU days that i think of so often and wish we could all hook up and have time to catch up. But I also know some people just aren't the staying in touch type. Yet there is a price for that inability that effects others too.

Sanj has been thinking of his close friends from high school... they were family to each other as it was a boarding school. Yet none of those people were in his live when we got married. And the people that were in our wedding, 90% of them are not in his life now. He is one of those people that is not a good "stay in touch" person. His 25th reunion was a chance to connect again and question the fluffy people in his life.

As a bystander, watching him go thru this journey, it is a little weird as I wasn't in his life then. These friends have a bond that I can only see and hear about. I had conflicting emotions as he has a lot of "girl friends" and I had to really chose to allow him that space to connect and be close that I don't often have to do. But as I watched I also saw that these people are so much of who he has become today. I have enjoyed being allowed to be included in that time and see him outside of himself.

It is so important to allow our spouses autonomy... and not make them feel guilty. I realized that I need to encourage Sanj to connect with these friends one on one as that is the only way that friendship can bloom again. it is not as real when the spouses are tagging along... I don't think that real conversations can grow with the worry of how a spouse may feel etc.

Yet at the same time while it was great for Sanj to reconnect... it made me feel included when he told me his friends wanted to get back to our place to spend time with me. It is a delicate balance... mixing the past and present... one that draws on trust, love and respect. i suppose that is a good basis for a happy marriage as well as friendship.

Nice People

Part of the journey in my "metamorphosis" is defining people in my life.
A) There is my family.... Sanj and my boys.
B) There is my immediate family... my parents and brothers.
C) There is the real friends in my life that add and bless my world. (Here would be a great place to have an older mentor friend)
D) NICE PEOPLE... these are the fluff people... the extras in a movie.

My "homework" was to identify the NICE PEOPLE in my life and work on reducing their presence in my life. I realized that there are many ... and they are draining. They take, ask too much, tell too much and really add nothing to me as a person. People will tell me things on first meeting... way to much information... a "friend" told me that she had varicous veins in her vagina on first meeting! DID I NEED TO KNOW THAT?

It is about me learning to set up boundries for myself and the people around me. So this has been quite a discovery for me and an even bigger one to really try to live by.

25 years...

This weekend was Sanj's 25th alumni from high school. He had 2 friends from high school stay with us, Emily and Janette.
It was a great weekend for Sanj to reunite with yesteryear and renew friendships that meant a lot to him. What was interesting to me was more the whole church thing. Sanj said out of 20 people only 2 were still in the church. Someone missed the boat. Friday night vespers was a recap of the school's history and then followed by a "time of trouble... the last days are upon us..."sermon. I felt sad that the people who planned the weekend didn't seem to realize that they were preaching to the choir!

It is also sad for people to not understand that just because one has left a specific denomination does not mean that one has left God. You can not go thru years of Christian schooling and not remember what you were taught. As an adult, it is simply a choice to believe and have a faith that works for you as an adult... it may be different than what you were raised with but different doesn't have to be wrong.

For me, since I do not focus so much on a specific denomination, I have grown as a Christian in a way I never did focusing on church. It was interesting to see that most people came back for was nostalgic memories, not to be brought back to church. Sanj singing and playing with his friends was more of a spiritual experience than the sermon.

I am not putting down anyone that is fulfilled with a denominational experience. There is a lot of positive that is parting of being in a specific religion but it is not for everyone. It shouldn't be an assumption that leaving a church is the end of a person's salvation.

OK reading this back I am sounding preachy. Sorry.

25 years was a long time and then again it was only yesterday. It is amazing how much those years are still so part of who they have become. It was great to meet wonderful people...a couple of half sisters too! :)

I wonder what experiences the boys will experience in their coming years and the people it will mold them into.

Thanks Janette, Emily and Greg for sharing the weekend with us. Thanks for being a big part of who Sanj was and taking him back there for a visit. Thanks for welcoming who he is today...hope you get some sleep.